Flirting Tips and Mirroring

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Mirroring: A borrowing from psychology studies

When learning how to attract a man, you should understand some of the psychology of human interactions. There is a phenomenon in psychology called “mirroring”. When you look into a mirror, your mirror image replicates your actions. The same has been found to hold true for two people who are deep in conversation. As the conversation unfolds, gestures, word usage, tone of voice, and stance are copied by one or the other person. An easily understandable example of mirroring is when one speaker smiles during an amusing part of the conversation, the listener may find him or herself smiling as well. Mirroring seems to be some sort of communication dance between two people.

A start in childhood

This effect starts early in a child’s development, before she has even an inkling of how to attract a man. When a child displays emotions, such as intense pride in some well-done work, the parent often plays up the emotion by exhibiting pride also. This builds rapport with the child and increases his or her confidence. Some child psychologists think that this type of mirroring is essential for proper childhood developement.

Bridging differences

In the case of adult flirting tips for women, what is the effect of mirroring? It turns out that copying the actions or words of another person has the effect of bringing the two people closer together on an emotional level. This may be that the mirroring effect allows a measure of empathy to develop between the two parties, thereby making it easier for the listener to feel the emotions of the speaker and vice versa. During your conversations with men, pay attention to both physical and verbal details.

Physical mirroring during conversation

For physical mirroring, observe how the man stands, such as whether he is relaxed or upright, how he breathes and whether he moves his hands or arms in conversation. Know how to attract a man by trying to point your body in a complementary direction. If he is pointing his body toward the left, point yours to the right so that your directions complement. Check the speed of the breath in conversation and try to match it. Smile or frown at the same time as the speaker. If there are hand gestures used to exaggerate elements of the conversation, be prepared to do the same when it’s your turn to speak.

Verbal mirroring during conversation

For verbal mirroring, note the tone of the voice, pace of speaking, and the vocabulary that is being employed. For example, if the tone is excited, try to match that level of excitement. If the vocabulary of the conversation involve something as unique as an animal metaphor, respond in kind with your own! Some people advocate paying attention to the kind of sense words used, such as the a speaker saying “I see” to indicate understanding rather than “I understand.” Mirror that kind of sensual cue by starting sentences with “You can see” or “It seems”.

Moderation

An additional flirting tip for women is that it’s important not to take the mirroring activity too far. If you find yourself duplicating every action of your conversational partner, you may find the partner secretly appalled at your strange behavior. In the same way that a steady gaze that is engaged only 70% of the time, mirroring should only be done for a fraction of conversation during flirting.

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